Hey Islam, You Suck!

Most of you reading this are probably bloggers yourselves as the media tells us that we’re all bloggers now, the obvious implication being that people who live in the third world where a phone is a major luxury aren’t really people, or “notpeople” as Faulkner called them.

So you’ll be aware that there’s a section on the blogger homepage called “promoting your blog” which tells you how to make loads of money like those successful bloggers. One piece of advice I read in a newspaper was that you should keep to a popular subject like politics though it’s hard to see how you could find a niche that could be exploited when everyone else writes about the same thing.

Lately it occurred to me that the only way that I could add to the paltry 500 or so hits, most of which are from myself, is to say something insulting about Muslims.

Last night I was watching this documentary about some guy from the South of the US who went to live in A Muslim community for a week. The presenter, Morgan Spurlock of Super Size Me fame, went round asking Americans what they associated with Islam, and to a man, they said terrorism. They didn’t have a clue what a Muslim call to prayer was when it was played on a tape. The main protagonist was amazed to find out that Islam has the same roots as Christianity. To explain this Spurlock showed a cartoon displaying a tree with 3 branches, one of which Mohamed was sitting, which is deeply offensive to Muslims who are suspicious of images and hate to see any representation of their prophet.

So it’s tempting to say that the reason that Americans don’t like Muslims so much is that they don’t understand them.

Unfortunately I don’t think this is the truth. I’ve said before that the more I find out about George bush, the more I Hate him, and this is still true, even after his latest state of the union speech where he was talking up biofuels, which on the face of sounds genuinely progressive, which could cause a little cognitive dissonance for me, as it’s hard to imagine walking down the street shouting “George Bush we know you, you’ve come round to our point of view”. But it’s also true that the more I find out about the form of Islam that is practiced in the Middle East today, the less I like it.

There are many in the US who are quite happy to think that as Europeans aren’t so keen on Dubya that we must be all walking round wearing Bin Laden T-Shirts. The truth, as ever, is more complicated and nuanced than Fox News or USA Today would have people believe.

Personally, I feel that terrorism is the least of the problems that we face from the Muslims, who are amking a concerted effort to outbreed us. But don’t take my word for it, read the banners that they were displaying after those cartoons satirising Mohamed were published, one of which read, “we have the numbers” which is frightening true, as within 50 years there could be 3 times as many muslims as Europeans.

To me, the worst thing about those cartoons is how desperately unfunny they are. Those Danes might have been better of making a gloomy movie in Super 8 about how horrible it is being a muslim woman. But what struck me most is how the Islamic community reacted. If they are so sure that what they believe is the one true faith, why do they care what some cartoonists in a cold, wet, Northern European country think?

Still, at least those cartoonists got their work published around the world, which is more than I can say for my blog, though my brother and cousin did log on from Australia once.

So here’s a few thoughts on Islam of mine. I I’m probably wrong in thinking that the muslim community go round looking for stuff to be offended by so they can start a riot, though this is what the cartoon controversy suggests. But maybe I’m not. So here goes.

Christianity is Judaism with some of the nasty stuff taken out. Islam is Judaism with some more nasty stuff put in.

Any religion that denies people any pleasure in this life so it’s adherents can have 42 virgins in the next could only be believed by sexist psychopaths.
Travelling around Morocco I found many of the people to be rude, aggressive and greedy. People I know who’ve been to Egypt, Tunisia and Turkey have similar stories to tell.

What the people of Palestine have suffered is pretty trivial compared with what the people of East Timor and Kurdistan have suffered at the hands of Muslims.

Israeli women are very beautiful. I’d love to go to Israel and fuck every woman there under the age of 40.

It’s very obvious that the holocaust happened. Any who believes otherwise is a nutter.

Iran shouldn’t be allowed to have the bomb as it’s leaders are psychopaths.

The ruling class in Saudi Arabia are greedy, feckless idiots whose country will be an impoverished, overpopulated wasteland when the oil runs out.

Islam has a rhetoric of equity but many people in Bangladesh are starving to death while Saudi princes squander their enormous wealth on fripperies.

Turkey should never be allowed into the EU. There are far too many Muslims here already.

If Allah exists, why does he let so many people of his starve while so many non-believers have such a high standard of living?

Muslims blame others for all their problems but their religion is what stifles progress and leaves their societies so backward.

Europeans who convert to Islam because they think a Muslim Europe is on the way should all be imprisoned for life. If it was the opposite way around things would be much worse for converters.

If any Muslim reads this and declares a fatwa against me, this will prove every negative thing I said about them to be true.